Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
