She announced her abortion via fbk
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
