I showed him my bush... on skype.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
