So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Randomize
