yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
