She said her name was "party"
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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