so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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