What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
