omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
