No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
