i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
