So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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