I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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