would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
