She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
