Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
There's always time for handjobs
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize