Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize