he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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