Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize