I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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