You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
How drunk are you?
Completed.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
