loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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