Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
