i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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