So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You pole danced in your parka.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
