You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
