I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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