Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Be still, my beating vagina.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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