no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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