so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
