Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
