i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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