Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Randomize
