Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
