I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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