I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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