we have officially lost it.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Randomize