literally had 100 drinks last night.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
