but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
