Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
and she was petting her beer can
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
