If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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