Duck Duck Cougar?
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Randomize
