Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I have post one night stand depression
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
