Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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