hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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