Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
