sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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