Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
You're my little dorito
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
