Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
