Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
