I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
